243: You Can’t Be a Perfect Parent: Mother/Child Attachment Styles and More with Dr. Jaclyn Nofech-Mozes

In this episode, I sit down with clinical psychologist, Dr. Jaclyn Nofech-Mozes, to discuss all things parent-child attachment, why we all have the tools to attain secure attachment, and why we can’t be perfect parents. Jaclyn explains the four attachment styles, the primary components of secure attachment, and what “rupture and repair” means. She also shares why it’s essential to know your “shark music” as a parent, whether sleep training, breastfeeding, and daycare/nannies affect attachment, and how child attachment changes with age. Finally, she discusses fostering secure attachment with your child as the non-birthing parent, the impact of maternal mental health on attachment, and how we can initiate repair if there has been a rupture.


Key Takeaway / Points:

  • Jaclyn’s background as a clinical psychologist

  • What is parent-infant attachment?

  • On the four attachment styles

  • Why we don’t need to be the perfect parent

  • The primary components of secure attachment

  • On “rupture and repair”

  • On recognizing your “shark music”

  • Whether sleep training, breast feeding, and daycare/nannies affect attachment

  • How child attachment changes with age

  • How you can develop a secure attachment with your child if you had an insecure attachment with a parent growing up

  • On fostering attachment with the non-birthing partner

  • Why some mothers feel that “instant bond” and others don’t

  • On the impact of maternal mental health on attachment

  • Advice for how to initiate repair


Find Jaclyn’s website here


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Produced by Dear Media. 

Cameron RogersParenting